Mommy guilt and the power of Ebay

I never realized before I had children just how strong mommy guilt is. Had I known as a child, I could have totally used this guilt to my advantage, unless my mother is immune, which I believe she may be. Except the time she broke my finger, but I digress.

Mommy guilt is causing me to actually bid on a freaking McDonald’s toy on Ebay.

First off, you will see what a bad mother I am because my kids eat McDonald’s Happy Meals once a week. It’s their "thing" with Nanny on Fridays. Well, out of those danged Happy Meals come 34859384 useless toys, many of which are too old for them or just plain stupid (like the random black catlike thing with the bug eyes, I don’t even know what that thing is, how are the kids supposed to know?). But every once in a while we hit a Happy Meal jackpot, like when they have Hotwheels, or the Shrek talking toys, or the Madame Alexander mini Wizard of Oz dolls (ok, I liked those better than Emma did). In this case, it was a My Little Pony figurine. One I have since found is called "Skywishes with Gazebo." Notice that last word...gazebo. A cheap little pink and orange stand for the pony named Skywishes. Known to Emma as her pony box.
Insert Mommy frantically trying to clean out the toy room crammed with junk. Out went some random toys into the garbage, and some baby toys into the yard sale pile. I came across some cheap plastic thing with no apparent mate, and it went into the garbage pile. Oh, how I wish I could take that moment back. At this point I would dig through the garbage can for it had this not been over a month ago.

About 2 weeks ago, Emma starts asking, "Mommy, where my pony box?" while showing me Skywishes. I have no idea what the heck she’s talking about. But she kept repeating it, daily, several times a day. Finally I asked her what it looked like, not knowing myself what a pony box is. She tells me it’s pink and orange and her pony stands on it, and shows me the approximate size. Somewhere in my brain, I’m having a vague recollection of seeing an object of that description. That night, I search the toy room, but alas, no pony box. That nagging feeling of knowing where this box was kept gnawing at my brain.

Even Ethan was getting in on the game, as he would ask where Emma’s pony box was. One evening, while watching a Nascar race, he told his daddy that he needed to talk to Jimmie Johnson. Daddy asked why, and Ethan replied, "So I can ask him where Emma pony box is."
This was serious.

So I was travelling through the Walmart toy section and looking at the My Little Ponies when it hit me- the random pink thing that I didn’t know what it was. Oh my goodness, I had tossed the pony box. Panic stricken, I did the first thing a mother does when confronted with another, "Mommy, where my pony box?"

I lied. It was a good one, too. I told her that Swiper took it. That sly little fox, Dora’s arch nemesis. I was home free, only Daddy knew the truth. Until Emma, in her two year old way, started dwelling on this fact. "Mommy, I don’t yike Swiper. He’s mean to me. He took my pony box. Is Swiper going to take my pony too? Did you lock Swiper out? Swiper stole my stuff. Swiper take my stuff to his tree. My pony box in Swiper’s tree."

Geez. Why does she have to be this smart? She was seriously distressed by this turn of events and in fear that tomorrow, she might wake up toyless and Swiper would have a tree full of loot.
So I came clean. I told her that Mommy was a bad girl and accidently threw out the pony box, and that mommy would get her a new one. I admitted my lie and vowed not to lie to her again. After all, she’s smarter than me. She seemed to grasp the concept that the pony box was in the trash and Mommy was a bad girl. Daddy offered to spank me, which was quite helpful as usual, while he continued to chuckle about the whole thing.

So that brings me to now, where I am currently bidding on a freaking plastic McDonald’s toy. Heck, I’m thinking of getting her the whole set for Christmas, but of course the pony box will come out early. All for the bargain price of $15 and a chunk of mommy’s pride.

On a side note, I'm totally going to start hocking my kids' Happy Meal toys on Ebay. As long as it's not a pony box.